2. DevOps, which is too difficult of a concept for people to grasp, will split into two new factions called “Dev” and “Ops.” Hilarity ensues.
3. Development will return to a Waterfall approach, but with a twist: the release cycles will be even longer than once a year. Therefore, a new term is created: “Big Waterfall.”
4. In addition to the Public, Private, and Hybrid cloud, applications will migrate to a brand-new environment called the Data Center Cloud–which is essentially On-Premise except that the walls are painted white and the sky is painted blue.
5. Business Owners will be tired from 2012 and will request fewer features be added to applications–after all, “What we have is pretty good already, right?”
6. All APM Vendors will adopt PBD files as standard, thus increasing the effort, time, cost, risk and adrenaline associated with deploying APM in production.
7. Death by Powerpoint will overtake SaaS and Freemium. Customers on average will provide 4 weeks of hospitality per year for IT vendors so they can camp, present, install, babysit and demonstrate their APM solution onsite with the customer.
8. APM Consultants will not only raise their hourly rates, but open up physical storefront franchises called “H&R APM” “APM ‘R US.” Their Black Friday sales will be popular, but Cyber Monday deals will fail due to site outages.
9. New Sixth APM Dimension – Time Travel. APM solutions in 2013 must be capable of time travel so they can go back in time and prevent outages from occurring, thus completely eradicating business impact altogether.
10. Two Words: Supersized Data
Happy New Year All!